Big Shoes

It's been awhile since I've written, probably not since the restaurant opening. I have been so busy and any waking moment not at work I have wanted to spend with Mina. But this morning finds both of us at home watching the Rose Parade. I think this year is going to have a tough time living up to the year before it. The highlight of 2013 was, of course, Mina but it was good to us in other ways too. I got a new job. We visited family and friends in both Florida and California. So many other little things have piled up to make this year truly amazing despite the struggles of parenthood. Last night as I was reflecting on the past year, I realized how blessed I have been with some great years. Looking back, my first memory(ies) of every year for at least the past five is a positive one.
2013: Mina!
2012: Found out Mina was coming, graduated from L'Academie de Cuisine
2011: Moved to the DC area, started culinary school, got real jobs
2010: Started the year with a trip to London, ended with my wedding
2009: Got engaged
And it goes on like this. Year after year of good memories. I know I don't yet have that many years to look back on. Some years can truly be difficult and negative all year long, I'm sure. But I think that even the worst years must have something good in them. So in 2014, I want to focus on those things. I doubt this year will be as good as the last but I have high hopes.

Here are some favorite 2013 memories:

February 9

Ted's with the family

Father's Day Pint and Half-pint

Disney World

CA for Great Grandma's Birthday

Remember Me?

Hi, I'm still here. I really do want to keep up the blog so everyone can know all the exciting things happening in our lives and watch Mina grow. I think as my work schedule becomes more regular, it will be easier to find time to write. The past couple weeks have been a little crazy as we are trying to open in a week or two. I anticipate the next few weeks will be busy too. But this week has been a nice lull, the calm before the storm I guess. So what haven't I shared?
I don't think I ever mentioned anything from Mina's visit to California way back in September. Mina was the perfect present for her Great Grandma's birthday. We were able to spend a lot of time with family which was great and Mina helped her newly engaged Aunt take engagement photos and look at wedding venues. Mina was incredibly spoiled with all sorts of new toys and clothes and there was never a shortage of people to hold and play with her. She impressed everyone with her awesome crawling skills and figured out how to climb over a small ledge while we were there. Highlights from the week were swimming with Grandpa, visiting Noah's Ark exhibit at the Skirball Center, and playing in Great Grandma and Grandpa's family room every morning (except when she toppled and bumped her head on the tile). The week ended up going by way sooner than I expected and we didn't get a chance to see everyone we wanted to. This means we will have to go out again soon and hopefully Ben can come too next time. I think the best way to share all the fun Mina had is through pictures:

Just Keep Swimming

It's 9:00 on a Thursday, Mina is sleeping, the diapers are in the laundry and I am breathing... just barely. The past month has been an ocean of never-ending waves. So many amazing things have happened but I have hardly gotten a chance to appreciate them as the next body-beating wave comes over me. Somehow we are all staying afloat. I love my job, Mina loves daycare and soon we might have some money for more than just paying the bills. But I am exhausted.
So for now you will have to excuse me for not writing much. Right now all my extra energy after work is going to my beautiful baby girl. This girl is crawling everywhere, pulling herself up and exploring so she requires a lot of energy. Yesterday, on her 8-month birthday, a tooth poked through and today there is a second one! She is growing so quickly.  I think it goes quicker when I'm not around for every
(sometimes painstaking) moment.
I am still here. We are tired, but happy. Next time I do find time to really write, I'm sure I will have much to share.

A Little Bitter but Mostly Sweet

I have started writing this post a few times now but I'm having trouble because I have to make a confession; I am back at work and I love it. I love being in a kitchen again. I love having my own identity besides "Mina's mom" and to my surprise, I don't really miss being home with my baby. I feel a little guilty about this. I thought no moms wanted to go back to work because they hated being torn away from their little ones. Why am I enjoying it?
I think for the past seven months I have been so focused on Mina that I forgot how to be myself. I knew I loved being a mom but I forgot I had other loves as well. When I am at work, I don't feel like I am losing precious time with my daughter. I am spending time on myself so that I can enjoy the hours with Mina more. I love her so much and the evenings and days off are wonderful. I don't believe everyone needs to work to enjoy time with their children but it seems like maybe I do, at least right now. My pastry career has just begun and I'm not ready to give that up yet.
I thought I was made to be stay-at-home moms. But the mental and emotional stamina required to be home with a baby all day is a bit too much for me right now. I'm still overjoyed to be a mother but having the work day away from Mina helps me be a better mother when I'm with her. Being away this past week has also exposed what an amazing Dad and husband Ben is. Her and Mina have had some great times together. Despite his full work schedule, he has managed to cart her to babysitters, wash diapers, feed her and much more. Out of the two of us, I think he would make the better stay-at-home parent. His capacity to endure mustache pulls, pinches and bites while happily holding Mina amazes me.
I'm sure it will be a struggle to find and maintain a good balance of work and family but we will try the best we can. Wanting to work doesn't make me less of a mother or mean I care any less about my baby. I won't say I have enjoyed every moment but I have been so blessed to stay home with Mina these past seven months and wouldn't trade it for anything. I'm also excited about my new job. I applaud parents who juggle work and family and those who have the taxing job of being home with the kids. We are all doing amazing things.